You stay classy, Detroit…
(313): I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Good ol west Michigan…
(616): whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook. (231): i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
(951): my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn’t remember. i think he understands.
stay classy, Inland Empire.
(954): Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That’s my kind of emergency.
Yes.
(916): This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn’t belong here
I can’t wait to start DUI classes…
(405): I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store… I feel like I’m living in an episode of It’s Always Sunny.
Awesome.
(989): dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I’ll look like pregnant…run far far away
I can safely assume this was at Central Michigan University.
Good ol Michigan…
(313): Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said NOT OJ
You stay classy, Detroit.
(608): no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I’m finding this girl.
Silly Canada
(651): how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
and
(940): Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
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